Showing posts with label Christmas music. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christmas music. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Do You Hear What I Hear--AGAIN?

I used to believe that there was no such thing as too much Christmas music. Now I'm not so sure. There is definitely too much of some Christmas music. A peculiar mathematical ratio comes into play on retail store holiday music tracks. The more insipid the song, the more often it loops in the mix. That means that in the time it takes to pick up a roll of paper towels, a new toothbrush, and a box of Bounce sheets Do You Hear What I Hear? will have played twice, the reindeer will have run over Grandma, and you’ll want to shove Frosty the Snowman into a tanning bed and slam the lid shut.

But those lame songs aren't even the worst. The reigning terror of the Yuletide air waves? O Holy Night. Every breathy-voiced pop-star and nasal-twangy country diva and wailing R&B singer has his or her own heinous hatchet job version of that poor tune.  It's OK, O Holy Night has probably saved me a lot of money over the years. As soon as I hear the first violins swell I flee the store before the piped in Christmas soundtrack pushes me over the edge and I throw up in a fuzzy Santa hat or stick a thumb tack in a Sponge Bob lawn inflatable 

I'm not as big a Scrooge as I sound. In fact, I adore the holidays. I love everything about this most wonderful time of the year. So, you'd better watch out because it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas and I'm a certifiable Yule-a-holic. I deck the halls and haul out the holly and roast the chestnuts on an open fire just so I can have myself a merry little Christmas. And when silent night falls I go to sleep counting my blessings. On the midnight clear you'll find me dreaming of a white Christmas. Well, actually I don't yearn for winter weather. But let it snow, I'll just dream of the little town of Bethlehem and the wise men who came from far, far away. In a manger on that first Noel the shepherds found the baby Jesus. A new star shone and angels sang with joy. To the world it is just a fanciful story, but to me it represents every hope, all love, the promise of peace. I want to go tell it on the mountain and sing with the angels "Glory to God in highest. Peace on earth, good will to men."

Somebody stop me . . . it seems my brain is fully saturated with Yuletide songs. They're taking over the planet . . . and my post. Major award to anyone who can identify at least twenty lines from or titles of Christmas songs in the paragraph above. What low-budget Christmas ditty makes you cringe or stands your hair on end before you can change the radio station? And what's your favorite Christmas music?